Seven Pirates H | Review | Nintendo Switch

  • Developer: Compile Heart
  • Publisher: Eastasiasoft
  • Release Date: 12/05/2022
  • Price: £34.99 / $39.99
  • Review code provided by EastAsiaSoft
  • Version reviewed: 1.0.0

Introducing: Seven Pirates H Review

Seven Pirates H is the fourth and so far latest entry in the Genkai Tokki series. It features, like all the entries before, a stand-alone story, a strong focus on fanservice (visually), and more or less obviously hidden sexual innuendos (writing). Think over-the-top sexualization, or as the Japanese would probably say: ecchi-content. This time, though, and in a fresh twist to the series: The main protagonist is a woman.

Seven Pirates H is, contrary to the other two franchise entries available on Switch-Moero Crystal H and Moero Chronicle Hyper, not a dungeon crawler. It is however, an RPG with turn-based battles, an overworld and dungeons to explore. You play as Parute Kairi, a pirate girl in search of treasures. Various monster girls assist you after you meet them on your expeditions, and also the notoriously infamous Otton, a returning pervert monster boy with a penchant for bras and panties, is at your side. Cruising the Monsupi Sea with your ship—this is the overworld—and then fighting monsters and monster girls in search of riches, bras and panties in the dungeons is the gameplay loop for Seven Pirates H. Yes, there is some semblance of a coherent story, but let’s be honest, you don’t play this game for it—unless your main interest in stories is crystal-clear sexualised puns. In short, if you expect ManBooker Prize like quality storytelling, you’re in for disappointment. That said, the story is not terrible, but quite contrarily very light-hearted and ridiculous, as it uses over-the-top stereotypes and cliches throughout the whole of the game.

Character builds have never been so bouncy

The game begins with a broken compass falling onto your head. Right after that a strong wave sloshes you away and when you come to your senses again you notice that you have company: Otton joined you and explains that the compass will show you the way to seven treasures if you follow its guidance. With that knowledge secured, you set sail to do just that.

Sailing around the Monsupi Sea, you make landfall on islands in search of the aforementioned treasures. These islands are inhabited by monsters and monster girls who need to be vanquished in standard turn-based battles. Enter a battle to have the usual choices of Attack, Defend, Skill, Item, and Run Away at your disposal. Getting hit by an opponent decreases your HP, using a skill will cost MP. So far, run-of-the-mill RPG fare. What sets Seven Pirates H apart is the fact that your characters have neither levels nor can they earn any form of experience points. What they do earn, though, is booby training extract which you can use to develop the characters’ breasts. Simply use the extract to fondle the a character’s breasts in a mini-game. Playing in handheld mode will let you use the touchscreen, otherwise simply use JoyCon or Pro Controller. Rumble support is there, too, which I only mention for completeness. How you interact with the boobs alters size, firmness, cleavage, height and other properties of the girl’s chest area. And here comes the rub (Pun definitely intended!): Fondling influences the growth of the girl’s stats. For example breast size and ATK/AGI stats are connected. Go for large breasts to raise ATK or value a smaller size for greater AGI. Sounds like a juvenile teenage dream? Definitely! Is it fun? That depends on your tastes. Just be prepared to do this a lot, because it really is the only way to make your girls stronger.

OK, perhaps not the only way, because there is still equipment you can use on your characters. Albeit, in keeping the theme of the franchise, your choice of equipment is limited to bras—which can grant special skills—and panties—which alter a character’s stats. You can either find the underwear in treasure chests, craft it in exchange for monster drops and gold or simply buy it from a merchant.

While were at it, let me just mention the gacha mini-game where you crack eggs that you sometimes receive as monster drops. They come in different colours and need both luck and finger technique: Crack them right and have luck on your side to get a rare or better item for your inventory. Fail or have bad luck and end up with goo splattered over the girl’s bosom.

For eyes and ears

Is it really necessary to mention that the anime art style of Seven Pirates H is well done? We’re talking about a game whose focus is on fanservice, after all, so it should be a given. To get it out, yes, the graphics are well done. As are the animations of the various monsters, monster girls and their more or less well endowed bosoms. Jarringly, however, less care was given to the different environments, aka dungeons, which you have to traverse. They are colourful and nice to see, but somewhat empty, even if they are infested with monsters. I found it strange that the only environment that was somehow interesting was the Haunted Ghost Ship. But then again, the focal points of the game aren’t the ones hidden in the backgrounds, right?

Turning our attention from the eyes to the ears, it is wonderful to note that Seven Pirates H features a full cast of voice actors to breathe life into the monster girls. Unfortunately, it is Japanese voice acting only, but it is fun to listen to for the atmosphere of the game alone. Speaking of atmosphere, the music in the game is noteworthy as well, as it doesn’t distract you from looking for treasures, but still keeps you engaged and humming along.

Any cracks in one’s sanity?

Seven Pirates H performs well both handheld and docked. No hiccups, no stutters, just fluid animations and good touchscreen and rumble support. Especially around the upper body area of certain characters. Who would have thought?

Conclusion

Seven Pirates H is a game for a very select group of players. Moralist RPG players will rightfully scoff at the sexualization present in it. Those, however, looking for such content should be delighted with what’s on offer. The game plays well and is engaging enough to be more than just one more ecchi game. I still feel that the environments would have deserved more love, to make them look less barren. Additionally, a lot of the side-quests, or Requests as they are called in the game, centre around fetching monster drops or slaying x amount of monster y, which is again a bit bleak.

PROS

  • Choice of difficulty via unlock of additional training items
  • Interesting way of creating character builds (if you’re up for it)
  • Lots of breasts (if that is your thing)

CONS

  • Booby training gets tedious after the first few times
  • Not a game to play on your commute or in the family living room

Verdict
Seven Pirates H is a worthy entry in the Genkai Tokki series. Still, the dungeon crawling experience of Moero Crystal H and Moero Chronicle Hyper were a tad more engaging and would be my recommendation for newcomers to the series. In spite of that, I had a blast searching for treasure and building my characters in Seven Pirates H.